I finally designed my card and sent out for print.  Hope it is a good investment.  Now I have to work on the web site before I received the cards, so if people ever check it out, they can see something.  One thing leads to another. At the same time there are a couple of projects lead from China I'm trying to find local architects for.   I also try to find a way to market solar panel partenr up with Chad's friend.  Fully use my spare time, I try to take Alex to my gym two afternoons and go to library story times, and join some play groups.  It seems there always too much things to handel.  I wonder if I'm a person too easy to be distracted.  Focus can create more power, but when you don't know which one will work out, you can't keep all your fish in one pot. How to stay focus?  I ask myself again and again.... Which one should I pick? 

After both the boys slept, I finally have some time to design logo for my company.  I need to print name card and set up web site soon.  It is impossible to do any marketing without them.  It may not be a good time to start a business now, but it is better than waiting around and doing nothing.  I registered the company about one or two years ago, but didn't have time do much yet.  This maybe the golden oppotunity to give it a new life now.

It is very easy to have ideas, lots of them and it is fun and exciting.  I remember several times chatting with friends about different ways to start a business, doing different trades.  But nothing really come to fruit yet, and most of those friends are no longer in Seattle now, either moved back to China or other cities in US.  Because doing things usually takes much more time, more  tedious, you may lost the vision and the excitment pretty soon.  Just design the modify the logo and design the name card, took much more time than I expected, and I still can't make up my mind.  I really need to ask friends to help me to choose one. 

 

Thanks for friends' comments. it seem most people like C.  I was perfering A, but now I have a second thought.  Then a couple of friends don't like any, one said it is hard to read A, so I make some revision.  I wonder if that make it better.  Should I use this new one or C?  Your feed back is really valuable.  Thanks a lot!

I was looking for the most advanced technology to create illusion of the historical palace on the preservation site that is not allowed to build for a friend in China.  It will be funded by goverment with generous budget. Then I found 3d Digital holography, it is mind blowing!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HicaK7NTHQI

I think with advance of technology, soon it will be hard to tell the real from illusion.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRViE4N-u5Y

I wonder how this technology will affect architecture.  It's so exciting how technology changes people's daily lives.  Sometime I feel architecture is so draw behind, it is such an old industry, not bring any new exciting change to people's daily lives during recent centuries.  All we did is use the new software creating some wired shape buildings.  No wonder so many architects are out of work and so irrelevant. 

How can we keep up with new technology and use it to create new building that meet today’s needs?  How can we be part of the technology revolution, not just tightly grab the old days and perfecting the details that most people don’t really care except architect? It brings a serious question to every architect, if we don’t want to be left behind.

How to Win Friends and Influence People

This is Dale Carnegie's summary of his book, from 1936

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Part One

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1. Don't criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

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Part Two

Six ways to make people like you

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.

---

Part Three

Win people to your way of thinking

1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, "You're wrong."
3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.

---

Part Four

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

A leader's job often includes changing your people's attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:

1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

Got in the office in the morning, slowly started the daily routin.  First fill in the time sheet, then check office email see if any urgent questions need to be resolved.  Call the city and follow up the email I sent last week of a field change application.  They lost the one I mailed to them, these beaurocrats.  I still need to maintain my patient and sounds cheerful and pleasant when talking with the city reviewer. 

"When do you think this can be approved?" I make it sounds pretty exciting.   

"It won't take long" He still gave me a vague answer. 

"Shall I call you again on Wednseday to follow up?"  I want to nail it down. 

"Sure, that will work."

"Thank you, Ron" I finally remember to add his name in, which takes me a while. 

For some reason I was shy and hesitate to say people's name when I talk to them.  Dale Carnegie said people's names are one of the most important things to them.  Americans are pretty good at it, they always address you with name during conversation and try to make u feel special.  I start to get use to this idea.  After checking three emails on different acount., I got back to my work email again and take a closer look.

"You are on the front page." an email grab my attention.  It was from Lawrance, he said he saw my picture at Seattle times taken from the bus about a report on crowed Metro bus.   I became curious and did a search and find the article on line: http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2008163633_busybuses07.html 

Now I remember one day after work, an older guy on the bus was kept taking pictures. He took quite a few, standing on his toes, with camera above his head, bending over, all different angles.   I thought he was a tourist or amature photographer. Being in American, people pretend didn't notice, just look away.  I wonder if they know it is for the paper, how many will look into the camera. 

 

Eventhough the whole thing actually has nothing to do with me, I still feel excited and forward the link to Chad and some coworkers.  My coworkers felt excited too when heard I'm on the paper.  Then we started to talk how the bus gets crowed everyday. 

"Soon it will be like Indian, people hanging on the door." Archina said. 

"I remember saw this frail little lady at international district with two bags of grocery, just forced onto bus and sneeked into the small gap between two persons."Marc said. 

"Usually here when they said the bus is full, there are still space for a few.  In China, people will push each other to get an extra inch of space." I added.  

So end my "One minute of Fame".  I got back to work and life moves on.  It once again proved like Dale Carnegie said, "Being Important" is one of the most secrete desire in every human's mind.  If we can't be important ourselves, be part of some what important event or group will help, that's why we watch Olympics, feel proud of China's grand opening ceremony, feel proud of the most gold medals other fellow chinese won... ...

  

 

Three secrets of the one-minute manager. (Management of an Accounting Practice)

by Blanchard, Kenneth

Abstract- The credo of the one-minute manager rests on the implementation of three ideas, namely: the need to establish clear-cut goals, the need to praise good performance, and the need to reprimand people when their performance fails to contribute to the attainment of commonly agreed goals. This three basic ideas are known as the three secrets of the one-minute manager, namely: one-minute goals, one-minute praisings and one-minute reprimands.

The First Secret: One-Minute Goals. All good performance starts with clear goals. If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there. This is about as fundamental as God, mother and apple pie. If we were going to improve the performance of people all over this country, the simplest and easiest way would be to make sure people have clear goals.

I had breakfast recently with Lou Holtz, the head coach for Notre Dame. Holtz showed me a little book he had for himself and for each of his players where everyone sets individuals goals in addition to some team goals each season. I asked him why he used these books and he responded, "Of all my experiences in managing people, the power of goal setting is the most incredible."

It is amazing how often people are told about the power of goal setting, yet how few times there is agreement between what a person says their job involves and what their manager says it involves. Goals still tend to be set in organizations after someone does something wrong or doesn't do what is expected. Then the goal is made clear.

The secret of One-Minute Goals is simply to agree on your goals upfront so that you know what good behavior looks like. Make sure you write out each of your goal on a single sheet of paper or index card. Limit the number of goals to three to five. Identify what the present level of performance is on each goal and then what level is desired. The discrepancy between the actual and the desired goal becomes the area for improvement. Choose a deadline for reaching that new level. Make several copies of your goals for home and work so you can refer to them daily. Look at your goals, then look at your behavior and see if your behavior matches your goals.

The Second Secret: One-Minute Praisings. Of all the things I've taught over the years, I can't say enough about the importance of praising. The key to developing people will always be to concentrate on catching them doing something right instead of something wrong. Yet most people are still managed by being basically left alone until they make a mistake that's noticeable and then their boss criticizes them. I call that a "leavealone zap" management style or "Sea gull management." Sea gull managers fly in, make a lot of noise, dump on everyone, and then fly out.

Tell people upfront that you are going to let them know how they are doing. Then there are three main things you need to emphasize with praisings. First, be immediate. Don't save praisings for a holiday. Second, be specific. Just saying to someone, "good job," is nice but it is not very helpful because they do not know specifically what is good so that they could do it again. Third, share your feelings about their work. Tell people how good you feel about what they did that was right, and how it helps the organization and the other people who work there. Stop for a moment of silence to let them enjoy "feeling" how good you feel. End with a reaffirmation and encourage them to keep up the good work.

Remember to praise progress even if it is only approximately right. Perfect behavior is a journey that happens one step at a time. A manager's job is to manage the progress toward the goal. A good manager thus constantly looks for opportunities to praise progress or to redirect.

The Third Secret: One-Minute Reprimands. What do you do when people do not perform well or make limited or no progress toward their goals? You have to hold them accountable.

The first alternative for poor performance should be redirection, which means going back to goal setting trying to find out what went wrong and getting them back on track. Never reprimand or punish a learner -- you'll immobilize them. If you are dealing with somebody who knows better, who as performed a similar task well in the past, then a One-Minute Reprimand might be appropriate.

Tell people beforehand that you are going to let them know -- in no uncertain terms how they are doing. Reprimand people immediately. Tell people exactly how you feel about what they did wrong. Pause to help your transition from your feelings to set-up the last and probably the most important part of a reprimand: reaffirmation. Reaffirm that you think well of them but not of their performance in this situation. Your intent is to get them back on course, not to try to make them feel badly. Remind them how much you value them. Realize that when the reprimand is over, it's over.

One of my favorite statements of late is from Dan Ferguson, chairman of the board of the Newell Company, a billion dollar manufacturing company in the home supply field. He told me he is most effective as a manager when he thinks of himself as the sixth man on a basketball team. When they want to call him into the game he is happy to play, but if they don't need him he is also happy to stay on the sidelines and cheer.

To me, the Three Secrets can help you be the coach in the workplace, at home or on the playing field. Share the secrets with your people, use them as needed and get your people to use them as well. You'll all perform better as a result.

Some great tips from Dan Buettner who write "The Blue Zone":

The revolution of the New Information Age

(No #5 Advance Communication Series) 

Today I joined a webinar on “Revit Architecture w/ Sustainable design”.  I wonder how many people know what webinar is.  I was surprised when I mentioned it to my computer programmer husband, and he didn’t even know what I’m talking about. OK, the people experienced it must feel the same thrill I experienced. It was truly amazing.  The lecture was given by two teachers, one focus on build building information model with Revit program, the other one shows how to import this model into a web site called “Green Building Studio”, which you can locate the model in Google earth and simulate sun, rain, temperature and study different options to make the building greener.  This last month I was kept experiencing the excitement and unlimited opportunities this information age brought to us.

 

First let’s talk about U-tube.  I bet everyone knows about this.  I was pretty late to start to use it and I was totally amazed by how much information they contain.  It’s like the magic box from the fairy tale; you can pull out anything from it with a wish, in this case, by typing in the word in the search box.  My son Alex who is 3 year old is totally obsessed with Spider man, one day he kept asking for spider man movies which I don’t have.  So I typed in spider man, click search, we got the songs and short cartoons, lots of them.  My son was totally thrilled.  Then we search for children songs and rhymes, he learned 6 monkeys bumped their heads very quickly. We also found different kinds of dinosaurs 

U tube Is not just a fascinating toy for kids, but also for adults.  I found different films on famous buildings that I didn’t have chance to visit yet, and also interviews of the famous architects talked about their ideas behind the design with sketches and models.  You can also find fly in of 3d models of new high-rise buildings in Dubai, which can open and close like leaves, and turning to follow the sun.  Lately I get interested in research on EQ and I was able to find the whole speech by the writer Daniel Goldman’s speech presented at Google Company.

Besides movies you can also find books in PDF forms.  I was able to find the whole tutorial of Revit, a new information model program for architecture on internet when I try to learn the program.  My friends want to learn sketch up, free 3D software, and I was able to send her the whole sketch up for dummy book by an email. 

 

Computer and Internet will and has brought us to a new age, the information age.  The change is revolutionary and impact everyone life.  What is this mean?  How this will change our life and society?  I think it will bring even more democratic and equality to our society. 

Because:

1.      Internet makes free resource sharing possible. The information is able to be accessed by mass.  It’s like how the print first came and changed the whole world.  The information is no longer owned and accessible to few rich and privileged people; everyone can find it and own it with a small amount of fee or for free.  Especially with library system, if you don’t own a computer or even internet, you can go to the library and use their most up to date equipment and get all the information you need. I think equal opportunities are essential for a society healthy development.  Each generation gets the opportunity to a fresh start, to catch up through education.

2.      Widely accessible.  People no longer limited by their locations, you can be in a big city or small town, a developed country or a poor country, you just need to basic equipment, then you will have equal access to the information resources.  You can take class on line, and join webinar in any part of the world. It’s a free media, and widely spread.  Government no longer has the sole control like the main media new paper or TV.  People can have their own voice and be heard.  This reminds me about Randy Pausch’s “the last lecture”, it is with internet, that his message got spread out so quickly and we learned the valuable lesson from him. Also it is the internet that makes Alabama’s grass root fund raising so successful, so he can compete with big guys that backing by big cooperates.

 

So what we can do to help with this process?

1)      Support our library systems.  Give donation to them, do volunteers, volunteer to teach young people who don’t have the opportunity learn about this new technology, as well as the old, and let them learn and enjoy what new technology brings to us.

2)      Use it to its full advantage and share the information.  More people know about it and use it, more powerful it can get.  For example, let’s go back to the new program revit, if all the consultants, architects and contractors use it, then it make integrated design possible. It will avoid huge waste of time, money and materials, because you can catch the problem already in the virtual reality. 

Of course like any powerful tools, there also limitations we need to be aware of:

1)      Large amount of information makes people easy to get lost. It is even more important now days to be focus and have a goal.  Otherwise you can lose the whole day surfing on internet without even notice it.  This is especially important to educate our kids.

2)      Security.  The free resources sharing may also let the bad apples in, like virus, spam.  We need to take cautious of suspicious source and enhance security with development of new software. 

It’s an exciting time.  Let’s embrace this information age which will bring more democracy and equality to our society and the whole world.

 

Writer’s Strike 终于结束了，这意味着悬而未决的奥斯卡典礼终于可以如期举行。作为一个电影迷，今年我基本没看什麽电影。 电影院去不了了， on line blockbuster 也取消了，因为实在找不到时间看，电影源源不断地来，后来已成了负担。 不过影评杂志还再读，对候选影片和演员依然关注。 尤其是今年，我最喜欢的两个男演员都获得了最佳主角和配角提名：Daniel Day-Lewis 和Javier Bardem， 希望他们都能赢。 可惜两部影片'There Will Be Blood' 和'No Country for Old Men'  都不是我喜欢的电影类型，枪杀恐怖的电影我一般是不看的。 今年也许会破例尝试一下。(如愿以偿，两个我喜欢的演员居然都得了奥斯卡奖！)

 

最早对Daniel Day-Lewis 有印象是看 “For the name of the Father.” 然后看了“Age of Innocent” 成了我当时最喜欢的电影之一。 姐姐也是他的影迷，强烈向我推荐 “My beautiful Langeratte”, 找了半天才在图书馆找到, 那时他还太年轻，没觉得那麽有魅力。 “My Left Foot” 是他的奖的作品，演一个残疾人，演得非常好，可惜故事太伤感。 他还和我最喜欢的法国女演员Juliet Binoche 演了昆汀小说”Unbearable lightness of Being”.  近来他的影片很少，只演了“Gang of New York” 中的屠夫和帮助他妻子一个独立制片的小电影” The Ballad of Jack and Rose“ 有点自闭的父亲。大概 再不会演什麽爱情片了。他和米勒的女儿有两个儿子，两个有才华的人幸福的生活在一起。有趣的是，在奥斯卡领奖的发言，他提到了三个儿子的名字，竟也包括了和法国演员阿加妮分手后生的儿子。 阿加妮也是我非常喜欢的演员，非常有个性，她擅长演悲剧，“于果的女儿”，“巴尔扎克的情人”， 当她怀孕，Daniel Day-Lewis 又与她分手，之后到美国发展，阿加妮说是她所演得悲剧中最凄惨的一个。 之后也很少看到她的电影了，至前两年看了一个关于战争的电影，是多年以后第一次看到她上银幕，还是很漂亮。

  

看过Javier Bardem 唯一的电影就是 “The Sea Inside”, 但受的震撼非常之大，觉得是看过最感人的电影之一。 尤其是揭露人的感情的真实性，不像好莱坞惯用的大团圆的结局，Ramon 和女律师的爱情美好而短暂，在死亡面前，人有时还是会依从本能选择生存。相反对Ramon 盲目崇拜的单身母亲，一直跟随他，为了爱情宁可牺牲自己， 帮助他实现他的尊严的死去的梦。  他实在是个难得的好演员，很好奇在新电影中的表现。前两天看了他主演的“Before the Night Fall”, 于古巴的一个同性恋作家的自传改编的真实故事。故事有些零乱。也很传奇。 觉得最真实的是当Reinaldo Arenas 终于来了美国并没有来到一个自由王国，而是正如从他所描述地从一个地狱到了另一个地狱。 美国以盲目崇拜金钱的社会，有多少人关心一个古巴作家所描述的童年生活，政治破坏？连美国本土的艺术家大概都难以谋生。  难能可贵的是，在他的了艾滋病，身体每况愈下，生活穷困潦倒的情况下，他居然在临自杀前写了三本书，包括改编成这部电影的自传。实在很佩服他。

 

他和Tom Cruise的前女友Penélope Cruz.在一起也很般配。最早看到Penélope Cruz 是在西班牙电影”Open your eyes”, 后被改编成美国电影”Vanilla Sky”. Penélope Cruz在两部电影演同一个角色，只是没有第一部那末青春了。 电影改得挺失败， 基本没什麽反响。 看原作的时候我很受触动，觉得西班牙电影不同一般，有许多挖掘人性， 质疑常理的东西，往往引人回味很久。还看了”Loversat Arctic Circle”, 也很有意思。 西班牙电影字词超过了法国电影成了我的最爱。 法国电影也挖掘人性，不过于西班牙电影比起，有些过于自恋，有点自我毁灭，无病呻吟。  西班牙电影更关心普通人的故事和情感， 从中发掘出不同的东西。Penélope Cruz 一直有点像花瓶，演了很多电影，尤其是Pedro Almodóvar 的电影.除了漂亮以外，却不能给人太多的印象， 角色的塑造都有些平， 没什麽层次。 直道看了她最近的“Volver” 才发现她终于成熟了，有了一种新的成熟的美感。虽然她在美国发展，电影演得一般，生活中却多姿多彩，每演一部，男主角就离婚的离婚分手的分手。 可见她在生活中的魅力，远远超过了电影中的表现。   现在她和Javier Bardem 在一起对她的演技也会有帮助，总比Tom Cruise 强多了。

 

终于又开始subscribe blockbuster,可以将奥斯卡季节的电影一睹为快，一周三个电影， 忙得不亦乐乎，反正要生孩子了，就索性利用快放假的时间放纵一把。说不定最终可以说服Alex，把新生的的宝宝改名叫 Oscar instead of Albert!

当同事都在网上看Heath Ledger ， 我还不只是怎麽回事，只以为又是与毒品有关的丑闻。 自己在MSN 上一查，大吃一惊， 真不敢相信这是真的。

 “I can’t believe it is true, he is dead！” I told my coworker, Macraea. 

“That what we just talked about, drug over dose”.

“Possible drug overdose.” Marc added.

“I didn’t know overdose means dead!”

看来我的英语又迷惑了我一把。

 

 

Heath Ledger 刚和他的女友分手不久，我想他肯定有些迷失。 可怜的是他两岁的女儿。 真可惜Hollywood又失去了一有个性的演员。 有个性有想法的人大概都容易迷失，因为不愿走别人走的路，自己去寻找答案，重新思考问题，有时难免走进死胡同。 我一直很可惜他和Nomi Watts 分手，总觉得他们更合适。 可惜年龄差别太大，在不同的生命阶段。 现在Nomi Watts 也和别人结婚生子，开始平常的生活。Heath Ledger 本来和Michelle Williams 有Settle down 的意思了，孩子也生了，可他又不满足，重新质疑自己的生活，最后分手，又开始四处游荡。 这种不满足与质疑的本性对艺术与创作时非常可贵的，可在生活中就往往带来悲剧。  好的艺术家，作家往往都有痛苦的经历，太快乐平和就难免平庸, 难于选择。。。。。

爬山的理论

好久没有产生任何理论了，每天忙于上班，回家做饭，带孩子睡觉，一天一天就这麽过去了。  Chad  到是大有进步，有天居然破天荒地总结了一个理论， 说“只要你比别人多准备一点，你就有可能站上风”。 我很Impress， Chad以前总笑我的理论，说都是明摆着的道理，我还总煞有介事，恍然大悟， 总结一条又一条的理论，还说我总用比喻。 最近看了于丹的“庄子，论语，老子”心得，发现自古以来的大哲学家都是用比喻来讲一些浅显的生活道理，顿时对自己的行为更有了信心。 可是思想枯竭，没有灵感。

上周有一件事给我的震动很大。前半周还觉得世界一片美好，冲满了Positive Energy。主要是我们的Toastmaster Group  蒸蒸日上，周四我们Induct 了11个新成员，作为VP Of Membership， 我主持了这个仪式。 大家都兴致勃勃，我的情绪也异常高涨，在回来的路上向每个人微笑点头。

没想到周五突然得到一个坏消息，公司裁员，那个德国设计师丢了工作，还有六个在波特兰的同事也未幸免。 不知为什麽这件事对我的情绪影响很大，也许我对这个德国设计师的情况比较了解，很同情她。 她已五十多岁，有离婚单身一人，总说自己很Lonely。 我还想帮她介绍，可认识的单身老头太少， 我建议帮她在网上建立一个Profile。也许是自己以前也有过丢工作类似的境遇，把昔日的感受都Bring Back。周五晚在网上看到以前的一个朋友，随便打个招呼问近况如何，竟回答“不好，都快自杀了。”我大惊，不知是真是假。 说你的博客前日才发了文章， 不是好好的。“都是假的”。朋友回答说。 我赶紧劝他，看看Anthony Robin’s “Awaken The Giant Within“吧，他一度曾经破产， 后来发奋成了福翁，还给总统作顾问，看他的书，就像喝咖啡，服用兴奋剂，绝对使你一下子热血沸腾。 朋友说道理我都懂，没用。后来还是朋友的妹妹给的建议奏效，说你一定会发财的，成为大富翁，会找到世界上最漂亮的女孩。 “真的吗？”朋友说，“那我再试试吧”。  看来关键时刻道理都不管用，人只需要鼓励。

这两件事使我从前半周High 带回了现实世界，发现世界还是有许多矛盾和困苦。周六一早起来，要去Officer Training 7：30就开始， 头脑里竟破天荒地又产生了一个久违理论“爬山的理论。” 看来要想成为思想家还必须经历矛盾和困苦。

爬山的理论是这样的：

我们每个人的一生就像爬山，有人自己爬，有人结伴而行。 婚姻就是找个长期固定的爬山伴侣，一路上互相关心，互相帮助， 共同采集食物。当然找个强壮的伴侣拉你山上更好。有人刚开始，精力和劲头都很很足 ， 很多人都想和他结伴而行，他和这个爬一会，和另一个走一遭，难以Commit。到后来，他也没了后劲，发现别人都有伴侣了，找到同行者还很难， 食物也难找到，万念俱灰，想从山上跳下来自杀了事。于是过路人便劝他说：‘你马上就要到山顶了，再坚持一下， 山上不仅风景好，有很多食物，还有很多美女等着你。“这个人就又重拾信心继续爬山。

工作也一样，有些是很多人一起爬山，Big Corporate，大家各有分工，统一采集食物，分给大家. 可一旦采集不到足够的食物，公司就要留一些人在山下，当然要选一些对他们作用不大的人。你要不然就提高能力，成为公司 采集食物的主要人员，必不可缺，要不就积极表现，工作态度好，什麽都肯干，虽然暂时没什麽大事可做，总可留以后用。 想想自己以前刚工作，能力不强，还不积极表现，几次丢了工作。 幸好每次都很快找到更好的工作，工资还涨了些。后来吸取教训，首先提高能力，而且一旦发展到一定程度，看到更好地机会，要及时跳槽， 自己给自己涨工资， 得到更多的挑战，能力就进一步提高。  所以千万不能死守， 看这个组织没食物了，赶紧找别的团体，他们可能还急着找人采摘摘不过来的食物呢。

也有些人能力强自己闯天下 ， 开公司，不怕被人留在山下了，采集食物也全靠自己了， 采的食物多了，还可以雇两个人打下手。

我们这些来到异国他乡的人，就像跑去爬另一个完全陌生的山，没有了祖辈的经验和告诫，告诉我们那条路能顺利地到山顶，一切都要靠自己自己摸索从零开始。

能不能爬到传说中美好的山顶谁也不知道，还是在爬山的同时即时享受沿路好的风景，保持健康的身体，愉快的心情，并和结伴同行者 Have a good time.

New Year Resolution 2007 Check:

1.      Go to Gym 3 times a week min., doing Iron Yoga once a week. Since I already paid for a year, can’t afford to waste more money!-)

Result: I did go to gym 2-3 times a week, sometime less sometime more. Didn’t go Yoga any more, more on elliptical. Need to do more Yoga at home.

 

2.      Learn to cook some delicious food for Alex. Alex doesn’t like left over, and easily get tired of the same food.  How to make food that he like can be challenge. But we shall overcome.

Result: Cooking did improve lately with help of Wenxue city more for pregnancy craving less for Alex.  Need to learn more cooking for kids.

 

3.      Take Alex to swim at least twice a month. Find some friends to go together, form a mom group.

Result:  Didn’t have chance to take Alex to swim yet.  But I signed on a class for him this Jan, so it will be done this year.

 

4.      Improve English speaking, listen to CD and meet friends to practice regularly. Find a new Toastmaster group near work place, and join them regularly.

Result: I did re-join the toastmaster group and even became vice-president of Membership. Did a few speeches, even though the results were good, but mostly last minutes preparation.  In the future need take more time to prepare and get better result.

 

5.      Learn Microsoft project and project management program.

Result: Didn’t use much as I liked.  Need to learn more on Microsoft project with New Kirkland project.

6.      Learn to use the new single reflective camera.  Put it in use.

Result: The funny thing is our camera was stolen even before I learned how to use it. Then we got a new one with some help of insurance.  Now I have to learn it before it got lost again.

 

7.      Read more books, draw more things by hand.

Result: Not much time to read or draw anything.  The time after work is usually taken by cooking and taking care of Alex to sleep. I should set up a goal, maybe a book a month or two months.

 

8.      Be more patient, and more organized.

Result: Still need to work on organization.  I think I get more patient with Alex.

 

2008 New Year Resolution:

 

1. Physical: Do exercises more regularly, go to gym 2-3 times a week for cardio. Walk the back trail at home on the weekends at least once a week. Doing Yoga at night at least 2 times a week.
2. Life: Work on cooking healthy, easy and tasty food, host a party once a while. Learn to cook food for kids, host a party for Alex’s birthday with good looking and tasty food.
3. Work: Manage a project and master Microsoft projects, be more organized and set up schedules. Hopefully help to set up connections with Chinese representative for the company and get some more Chinese projects.
4. Speaking: Involve more in Toastmaster, better prepare each role, especially the speeches.  Do more rehearsal and be well prepared.
5. Reading: Finish EQ quick book, work on improve EQ, and practice in real life. Read more other books on management and self improvement.
6. Children: Help Alex to get more physical exercises, take swiming class, and other classes. Find regular play date for him, form a kids group gathering once a month. Take care of the younger one to come, and balance attention to both of them.
7.  Hobbies: Learn how to use camera by the end of this year before Christmas shot.

First I like to ask how many women in these rooms would prefer to work part time with when you have kids.  How many men in this room would prefer your wife work part time? How many men would like to take part time job when you have kids?

 

Latest survey conducted by Pew Research Center shows most working moms prefer part time jobs. Right now 70.5 percent of American women with children under 18 work outside of the home, including 60% of mothers with children under 3. The Pew survey found 60 percent of working moms and one third of the stay at home moms said a part-time would be best.  The reality is 3/4 of working moms have full time jobs. This means as many as twelve million children of working mothers are too young to go to school. Two million children among them spent most of their times in daycare centers. 

 

This survey does show the difficulty working moms face today in USA to combine responsibilities at work and home, The survey also shows mothers working fulltime give themselves lower rating on assess the job they do as parents. They usually feel guilty about their choices; they also may confront attitudes from co-workers who may question their decision to leave children in child care or with a nanny.  Like Sabrina Parsons, CEO of Palo Alto Software at a casual conversation at a business meeting heard one man said “Thank goodness my kids are not being raised by a nanny.” Not working, being full time mom is surely not the solution.  The survey shows only 19% working women to prefer full time mom job. Besides the financial independency, some people feel they will get bored and lost their own identity, and social interaction at work. But would part-time job solve the problem like many working women imagine? Is part-time moms a solution for a work and life balanced family? My answer is No.

 

1. Part time work usually is not good for women’s professional growth.  When women work part time, they usually loose their responsibilities.  I spoke through my own experiences.  Working as an architect in many different firms, I seldom encounter any women architects with kids. There are one woman has kids who works part time, she is not licensed architect and not in charge of project.  The project managers meetings I attended, there are hardly any women let along moms.  I talked with another female friends working in a bigger firm, said she has several coworkers are working moms, but they mostly working part time and surely enough they are not project managers and in charge of project.  I told her I don’t want to work part time, because that means you won’t take important roles, if I’m working I want to grow in my career, otherwise why do I sacrifice my time from kids to do no essential jobs. Pemela Stone, a sociology professor at Hunter College in New York City interviewed 54 previously high-powered working mothers across the country who had left the business world.  2/3 of them were able to arrange some kind of part time work after becoming parents, but they felt a dead-ended in their jobs and their meaningful responsibilities were taken away, eventually they quit their jobs..

 

 

2. Parttime working mom is not the solution also shows in country like Australia.  Some article argue the reason mothers don’t work part-time right now as they would like to is due to a lot of time they don’t get same benefit like healthy insurance as full time workers. Robert a professor of labor studies and women’s study at Penn State university shows in his study, that Australia, where does provide universal health plan and equal pay for part time mom, the full time working women in US are 7 times higher choose to be a mom.  Why?  Because in Australia women face a much starker choice working full time or be a mom and work part-time.  At the mean time, dad is off the hook on housework and child care.

 

The question we really need to ask is why women have to choose between career and family but not men? Why the survey didn’t ask if father like to work part time and if that is good for the kids?  Or part-time options for both mothers and fathers?  Actually 12% of fathers prefer part time work but far fewer actually do so.  A stay at home father actually will face similar social pressure as full time working mom since people still hold tradition roles in their mind. It’s still a man dominant society.  Men and women created the babies together if they take the equal share of responsibilities in taking care of them, the parents can choose if the mom likes to stay at home or Dad or both part times, then the working environment won’t be so harsh to the working women like today. The good news is, things will gradually change. The survey shows women in the household make more money increased from 17.8% to 25% from 1997 to 2004, and the trend is continue.  An important data also shows 57% of college and university degrees going to women today vs. 43% are going to men.  Given the high value our economy placed on education that means we will see more and more women earns more than their partners.  Simple economics tells us more dads are going to want part-time in the future. This entire trend will change the culture in the corporate today, women no long at disadvantage of career growth when they have to struggle between career and family since everyone will face the same problems.  I’m sure savvy employers and policy makers then will start to make the “parents friendly” work place.   

 Is Part-time working mom a solution for a work and life balanced family?  My answer is no.  Maybe Part-time working parent, Dad or Mom can be the solution.

城里城外

 

早上坐车上班，碰上以前认识的朋友。 以前也只见过一两次面，通过朋友，并不很熟。坐车无聊便闲聊起来。她说他先生已自己干了，他们的目标就是攒够钱，回国休息。 于是我们一起抱怨，在美国虽然生活环境和条件还不错，但也很无聊，主流文化融不进，文化生活缺乏。看看朋友的博客就知道，在中国的都写看了什麽电影和书，在美国的大都写找工作和带孩子。

 

记得有一个好友说，不管出国前是能文还是能武的，到了美国都开始搞体育运动。以前打排球时就有碰到从中国来的各式各样的人才，也算藏龙卧虎了。 现在有了孩子，打排球的时间也没有了，下班外唯一的娱乐就是约别的朋友带孩子一起去公园玩。朋友刚从中国回来，也抱怨在美国没意思，没盼头，像坐牢。

 

一想觉得好笑，好不容易费劲考出了国，现在大家的梦想竟都是回国。 真象围墙里说的，“墙里的人想出来，墙外的人想进去。”大家在美国苦熬，等绿卡，等公民，为的就是回中国不受限制，然后再回中国申请绿卡。这一辈子不都在等待了？仔细想来实在有些自相矛盾，到底是想待在城里，还是想待在城外，也许最理想的是城里城外两边跑，这边腻了，就赶紧跑回那边。 也许人们真正需要的是自由，和一种期待。。。。。。

Why and how should we reward employee when they bring in works?

Dear principles, associate principles and other decision makers, today I want to present a proposal that may change your life, your employee’s life and the company’s spirit all in a very positive way.  You may be very curious now, what is it?  It’s all starts with a simple question: “Why and how should we reward employee when they bring in works.”

First let's talk about why.  As parents we all know if we want to encourage children's good behavior we should reward them when they did something right. Same principles applies to animals, I always amazed how the trained animals can do so many very sophisticate tricks, like a dog can run through a hoops on fire or a seal can jump up and do a 360 degree turn.  But if you pay a little attention, you can always see after the animal do the tricks, they usually go right to the trainers to get some rewarding food, and either it’s a fish or some cookies. It takes trainers year to train the animals to all these tricks just by rewarding them doing things right. All these have scientific base. Based on psychological study, this kind of rewarding system will help to make right connections between actions and consequence, with more nerves strings built up with certain connections, the desirable actions can eventually become automatic. If animal with little brains can accomplish so much with a simple rewarding system, can you imagine what human can accomplish?

But right now in our company we have no rewarding system in place in the company that incentive people to bring works to the company.  We usually solely rely on principles as the main sources to bring in work to our firm, but at times when market slow down, we should use all the resources we have, and encourage employee to use their connections to bring in works to the firm as well.  But how can we motivate them? It’s simple, just use same rewarding system, we maybe amazed that as adults we are not that much different from children or animals according to the book “One minute manager”.  I think that will be very good for the firm's long term growth. Think about instead of relying on two to three people bring in works for 60-70 people, we now will have 60 to 70 people take advantage of their social connections which will bring us more variety of works and choices.

Instead what we have now is not very encouraging environment. I talked
through my own experiences.  I tried in last few months trying to bring more work from China to the firm.  I made a lot of effort, spent a lot of my own time to make late night phones calls, and even spent my own personal time to design the project. But after a while I fell pretty discourage, since I don't see any point for my effort. Why on earth did I bring all the extra work for myself?  I will have much better and relaxing working days if I didn't do all these and still get the same pay check.  People can get $500 to $1000 reward when bring in an employee, but they don't get any reward when bring in a $10,000 or several hundred thousand dollar jobs. I don't think it make sense. 

 

Growing up in China, I know why socialist failed, simply because they don't reward people when they doing more and better, people get evenly paid now matter how
much they do. We had an old saying “It is the same if you doing more or
less, good or bad”. Eventually, people lost motivation and just get by. That's human nature or animals’ as well.   Imagine if the seal will get to eat fish no matter if they jump or not, do you think they will still jump and turn. I guess not.  That's why we see similar problem in Europe now when people don't make much more by working or enjoy unemployment benefit, eventually a lot of people get lazy and take easy way out.

 

How do we change this?  By bring in the right rewarding systems that reward people when they do good things that benefit to the company.

Once we all agree we should reward employee when they bring in work, then let’s talk about how? We should reward them with three things that people want the most: money, desired responsibilities and acknowledgement.

 

Let’s talk about money first. How much money? I heard some firm reward as much as 10% of the design fee to the person who brings in works.  I know Gary our main principle, said we don't really make 10% profit.  If 10% doesn't work, let’s try 3-5% based on the size of the project.  Gary also mentioned what if the project doesn't make money.  I think when employee brings in work; it’s the principles and decision makers’ responsibilities to decide if we should take the job and what fee should we charge. Then it's project manager's responsibilities to make sure to finish the project in time and under the budget. Since employee doesn’t share our company’s profit, they certainly shouldn’t share the loose. We can try out the system, as we go along and do a more close study. We can always adjust the number and make it work better.

Money is not everything, people want to grow and take more responsibilities. If the people who bring in the job have the experiences and like also to take the role as project manager, we should give them the chance.  If they can not only bring in the job but also finish job within budget, then we should use the reward system again, double reward them at the end of the job based on profit they made.

 

We should also acknowledge the person's accomplishment to bring more works to the firm. As Dale Carnegie said, people’s most secrete desire is to feel their importance. People want to make a difference and like to be appreciated and acknowledged.

With all three kinds of reward system in place, I think we will build an incentive working environment that will energize people, make them more involved, and make them feel they can make an impact. It will help the firm's long term growth. Then all of you can sit back and relax.  You will become one minute managers. You don’t need spend your weekends to do marketing, and since everyone working for you will do that as well.  People’s productivities will increase; company profit increase.  You can spend more time with your family; have a more profitable company with happier employees.  Isn’t that what we all want? So let’s make the change today, set up a rewarding system that works!

Thank you for your attention.

 

Geng Tan 10/25/07 No#3 Speech “The Winning Proposal” of “Persuasive Speaking”

做媒(1)

 

我这个人很热心，总希望帮别人牵线搭桥，希望大家都找到归宿，终成眷属。当然也有朋友说我是唯恐天下不乱，喜欢瞎缠和，看热闹。我也不与他们计较，有机会还是忍不住，想帮忙。  成果也是有的，在北京的一个好友已顺利地和志德的大学同屋结成百年之好，幸福的生活在德州。 还有一个纯属触类旁通，我的高中好友说她能认识现在的丈夫追踪下来还是因为我。 我介绍她认识大学好友的妹妹，当时也在沈阳，也是学英语的，就在一个使馆的讲座介绍他们认识了。不过这麽多年了，确实也是战果寥寥。

 

最近又发生了几个故事，不得不写一写。。。。

 

A.

这个故事的发生还是因为我妈妈。 妈妈回了中国后，退休没事干，先加入了教堂，（是在美国受洗的）后又参有加了老年大学， 开始学钢琴。 在教会认识了一个跟我妹妹年龄差不多的女孩，是音乐学院声乐系毕业的，在大学教音乐。和妈妈很快成了好友，经常教妈妈弹钢琴。 这个女孩仍是单身，这在沈阳这种地方，那就算非常稀有和困难的。说是她原来的男友出国了，后照顾生病的父亲，把自己耽误了。

 

妈妈很为她着急，想让我们在这边帮她介绍。我们结婚有孩子了，哪还认识几个单身的人。  再说在美国还有好多女的没找到合适的，而且这里多是搞工程的男孩都很实际，谁愿费那麽大劲进口一个，除非非常年轻（30以下）长得国色天香，这两点她都有点距离。 我们还是劲我们的所能，四处询问朋友，最后还在微软登了个广告，也就不了了之了。

 

一转眼，几个月过去。五一全家回国参加志德弟弟的婚礼，我们终于在吃饭聚会时见到了妈妈的这个朋友。 女孩个子不高，但性格很开朗，大声说笑，很豪爽的样子，我们一下也很喜欢她。饭后唱歌，女孩也不退却，一首青藏高原，一下就把我们震惊了，完全不次于原唱，跟音乐会的现场效果差不多。这样的女孩，找朋友应该不会有问题，我们对她顿时很有信心。

 

回家难免要与以前的同学联系。 和赵聊起他最近离婚的事，妈妈在一旁听到，马上邀请他来家里玩（他住在长沙）还说很想念他，哈哈。。 赵没有被诱惑，但听说我们描绘了这个女孩的种种优点，还是很感兴趣，马上要我发几张照片，并问MSN 号。　女孩当时还没有电子邮件，更不要说什莫MSN 了。　可几天之内，听说他们已经联系上了，还经常用视频交流。　让人不得不感慨信息时代，离我们真是只有一步之遥。　

 

当我们回来后不久，听妈妈说女孩说赵邀请他去长沙玩。我马上打电话问，赵开始还不承认，说她是有亲戚在长沙。“她可说是你邀请的呀。”“好，好，就算是吧！”赵这样支支吾吾，不是个好兆头。　和其他两个朋友谈起这事，她们都一致说坚决不能去，“男的感兴趣，早跑过来了，那又叫女的去看他的？”小左很中肯的分析。　赵的借口是女孩是老师有很多假，而他做项目很忙。女孩发电子邮件问我，我便建议她先观察，　不要急着动。但看来也晚了，女孩似乎主义已定。　赵个子不高，形象一半，但有几分才气，　正好被这个喜欢浪漫的女孩一下子欣赏了。　女孩一下子陷得有点深，开始怜悯赵的状况，“他这个可怜的人，有才华，却不知如何使自己幸福。”妈妈说当一个女孩怜悯一个男人的时候，多半都有点情况。女孩也开始解读赵的博客，本来一看就是赵卖弄文笔写的“我不能选择，也无法忘记。”女孩也解析出是赵无法忘记前妻。既然已经发烧了，当时唯一解决地办法也只有以毒攻毒了，　于是我们也不再阻止女孩坐上火车南区的旅途。　

 

我一直觉得人与人的交往，也像化学元素。　将两个元素放在一起，你很难猜出会发生什麽，也许毫无反应，也许会发热发光产剧烈化学作用，也需要催化剂的帮助，或有一些时间，逐渐产生反应。　我好奇激动地等着中国传来的新消息，　不知这次是什麽样的反应。真希望他们成了，女孩有了归宿，赵也不用孤苦伶仃，找到一个真正欣赏他的人，又懂艺术。　两人可以一起弹琴唱歌，　多麽完美的生活！　

 

忍不住好奇我给长沙打了电话。“已经在这了，＂赵兴致并不很高的样子，”你来跟她说吧。“　

女孩敞亮的声音到反映出了她的心情不错，”我的运气不错，刚到这就才下过雨，天气凉快了两天。“　Another bad sign.

 

两天后听到妈妈的电话，说是女孩把赵的电视砸了，搬到宾馆住了。　　刚给妈妈打电话，问她该不该赔赵的电视。　妈妈说，先别管了，回来再说。如此戏剧性的变化，到处了我的意外。我又打电话问赵：

“你都听说了，这个东北女孩也太暴躁了。一见面我就一点感觉已没有，他望我身边靠，我一个劲地躲。”

“那你告诉她了吗？”

“。。　可我的行为都说明了。”

“什麽行为？　你应该很诚恳地和人家谈谈，都说清楚，这样也不至于误会了。被人对你的行为的解释，你怎麽知道？像个成人一样，给她打电话，谈清楚。“

”我现在担心我的人身安全呢。“

“别夸张了，赶紧吧。　要不然我怎麽向我妈交待呀？“

后来听说赵克服了畏惧心理，和女孩通了电话，并送她去了机场。　在机场还说以后还可以做朋友。　妈妈说这个赵怎麽还在这误导。　妈妈告诉女孩，不要跟她浪费时间了。　

 

几个月后，我刚好出差回家。　女孩特地赶来看我，忍不住和我将长沙的经历。　“这个赵太有意思了，第一天接了我，吃饭时来了好几个人，有两个女的后来老跟着我们，有一个特丰满形的，我怀疑和他有关系。　　另一个女孩告我，她专喜欢离婚的。　后来晚上我和另一个女孩住一屋，他和那个女的在一个屋子，实在太过分了！“

我无言以对，　只告诉她，”别理他。。。。“

 

为此我一直觉得有点对不住女孩，当时看到各种迹象，应该拦住她，不去长沙。可妈妈说，去了也好，省得总心存幻想。　后来听妈妈说，女孩终于找到一个合适的男友，年龄比她小六岁，　对她非常欣赏。　　这我完全可以想象，想象我们听她的歌的时候不易被震惊了吗？真不明白赵，怎末就看不到她这麽多优点。哎，对一个人分文不值的，对另一个人也许就是宝玉。 真是要找到识货的人呀。 赵的前妻据说也找了个比她大十八岁的人，感觉自己很幸福。 赵仍孤伶一人。　 

欲望无限

 

几天来每晚工作到半夜，头晕，胃不舒服，也只有挺着。 赶紧把图准时发到中国，希望尽快签合同。

昨日，从波特兰总部来了电话，一个同事问东方威尼斯项目的情况，我就大概说了说。 先做两周方案，没钱，算市场开发，之后就知道能不能签合同，有二十万美元。 说了半天，他说之所以他会问，因为Gary 派他作项目的管理人。 什麽？！！！ 我一听就火冒三丈，我马上强压怒火，回到，

“不对我才是项目管理人。 我费了很大劲才得到这个项目，我们花了很多精力和时间，才到今天这步。Gary 没有权力不经我允许，随便派人。 我会给他打电话的。”

想到我的语气太强硬，我又补上，

“对不起，这不是针对你个人，我会和 Gary 讲清楚的。”

 

放下电话，我的怒火终于爆发出来，Fuck,　Ｆｕｃｋ…. Shit…. 我在办公室里忍不住大骂，愤怒的向Marc 和 Summer 讲述这个新闻。

 “I know they will steal it from us” Summer 也很气愤.

”Call Gary，tell him you are the project manager” Marc 说。

 “I will”　稍微平静了一下，我拿起电话打给Ｇａｒｙ，　没想到他马上就接了。　

＂Ｇａｒｙ　你好，我是庚。　　刚收到电话，Ｔｏｄｄ　说你派他作东方威尼斯的项目管理人。　我很吃惊，我们费了这麽大劲才得到这个项目，我才应该是项目的管理人。“　

Ｇａｒｙ　说，　“只是让他管理所有中国项目的钱和制定工作计划。”　

”这个项目我要自己管“我坚持说。　

“这是很枯燥的工作，你还是负责设计”。

“没关系，我都可以做，我要控制我自己的项目。”

“好吧，那天津和红楼梦的项目呢？”　

“天津的项目我也可以负责，红楼梦你们定，我无所谓。”

“那你要制定工作计划，按照每人收费标准和工作时间，控制好费用呀。”

“好，没问题！”放下电话，我忍不住说:”yea “. 

 

可是大获全胜的喜悦只有一瞬， 之后我开始发愁，又给自己揽了一堆事，这不是没事找事吗。  生活就像上升的螺旋，疯狂转动得仿佛失去了控制。 本来可以清闲地拿同样的钱，可我偏闲不住，给自己找了一堆事。刚得到了房子的offer, 还要办一堆贷款的手续； 刚当上Toastmaster  vice president of membership, 每月要开会，制定发展成员的计划，每周的会议还要问候客人， follow up, 培养领导能力，听着好听，就是处理一堆杂事。

 

只有一周半，我带三个年轻人做4000亩的规划。 雇了以前的同事Amoreena 做顾问，因为她有哥伦比亚大学的规划硕士。 她已经怀孕六个月了，大着肚子，和我们一起拼。 大家斗志很高，每天工作到很晚，还回到家继续工作。 Marc 为了做三维的电脑模型，做到早上三点。 每个人仿佛又回到了学生时代，在大学里熬夜作设计周的感觉，充满了热情，和梦想。 周四交图，说是六点交，我们还在忙着构图， 和最后的拼图。 Summer 带着书架实习生做得Powerpoint结果还是挺让我吃惊，看着还向那麽回事。Marc 的模型做得也很有细部。我终于把六个diagram 画好了，总平面图也终于将需要的住宅小区都fit in 了。 Amoreena 算得数据也终于和中国的设计院的数据吻合了。一切努力仿佛终于有了结果。 好事多磨，晚上九点到家，刚收拾停当，十点上网，又碰上中国设计院的人，说只收到了一张图。 什麽？我走前都传了的。只好再重新传，才发觉图太大，要一两个小时才能传完。 于是打开每张图，将它们缩小。 这时才发现几张图竟然没有图标，公司的名字。 Marc 的三维图竟没放一张整个效果的鸟瞰。 时间仓促，我竟也没来得及检查一下。 Marc 大概也工作过累，没了后劲。 作了那末详细的模型，竟没有表现出都少。 正好看到Marc也在网上，就告诉他关于图标的事，

”Oh man , this project never ends”. Marc 感慨道。“send to me ，I can add the title now.”  

“Never mind, I just shirk the size and send them.” 我也没劲折腾了。

“They can’t scold at us any way.” Marc 说。

 

没想到竟被言重。 周五接到楚总的电话，说现在给Gary打电话合适不？我说这周过节，最好不要打搅他，况且他才从中国回来。 于是楚总说，他和孙总谈了谈，他们对我们这次的方案不太满意，怀疑Gary没有参与（They are right!）他们有些担心，这样下去，他们在中国做市场，没有美国技术支持，怎麽能做长久。 于是我就告诉他，Gary 忙车成都的项目，没时间参与，一周后才告诉我，我带了几个年轻人，在一周半，费了不少劲才做成这样。 我会和Gary周二谈谈的。

 

周二给lee 和Gary 发了email, 说了中方的concern.  Lee 马上打来电话，问了情况，他最关心的还是会不会影响红楼梦的项目。 要我把我们做得东西传给他们看看。 周三是review, Lee 和Gary  都来到西雅图。 我和其他的几个managers 荣幸的得到他们亲自的review. 加上西雅图的两个老板几个重要的人物都在了。 Darn, 时机真不好，刚出了这个不成功的事，偏偏就review 了，再造几天就会是完全不同的状态。 在打图室碰到Gary, 打了招呼，顺便夸他精神又恢复富了不少。”After my trip to China, I get better everyday.” 自然谈到天津的项目，

 

Gary 说“Maybe we shouldn’t even do it, we may in a better position.”  我不得不点头称是。 

 

“You have to say sorry to Mr. Chu and Mr. Sun, there are just so much I can handle。 A day after I got back, they already asked for revisions, and more changes are coming. In China, people seem never rest!”

 

“Ｉcontacted a European architect friend, he teaches at UW.  He has done some work in China before with a partner in Vancouver.    I invited him to come over next Wednesday.  He is interested to work with us.  I don’t think we should totally banish our effort, we just need more help.”

 

柳暗花明，起死回生，我又有了新的主意。　没有Ｇａｒｙ的帮助也没什麽，我只要找到可以帮助我们的人，先从Ｄａｎ入手，以后再找其他的人。　Ａｍｏｒｅｅｎａ　经验还是不够。　

 

在ｒｅｖｉｅｗ中我首先罗列了自己一年的成绩，然后主动承认天津项目的失败，并提出今后解决的办法。　Ｇａｒｙ说　：＂I was really impressed when I said we may shouldn’t do that project and you said yes. I looked at your plans; it doesn’t have the flare that needed. In China, people do planning very differently from here.  I learned over the years, they like dramatic things.  When I first worked there, I don’t know what I was doing.  We worked on the plans and I did the layout then I looked at Wei’s layout.  Oh, I didn’t know you can do like that.  Then I started to loose up.  I learned a lot from Wei.”

 

“I agree we have a lot to learn.  We just need to find right help. I don’t think we should totally banish the effort.  In Seattle office, we do need the design opportunities. When Summer and Marc worked on the projects they were really excited and involved.   From my involvement with different young architect groups, I realized, young people usually care less about benefit, more about opportunities.  If we want to attract young talent people, we need more design work in this office and I think China＇ｓｗｏｒｋ　ｃａｎ　ｂｅ　ａ　good part of it.”

 

几个领导都点头称是。失败是成功之母，我们还会东山再起。　

 

有些人就闲不住，向我，总要自己给自己找事。　我总相信只要去做，就能学到东西，停滞不前就是浪费生命。　就是别人给我钱，让我闲着，我也不会同意，不进则退，时间和生命太宝贵了。　我的几个要好的美国朋友，说我是 “goal getter”  不知是褒是贬。他们到都比较ｌａｙｂａｃｋ．　

 

我和Ｃｈａｄ说，可这部正是西方的Ｐｈｉｌｏｓｏｐｈｙ吗？　每个人都有欲望，东方哲学叫你崭草除根，去掉欲望本身，西方哲学，教你各种方法论，叫你去得到想得到的。　　可是人的欲望总在发展，得到了一个，又有了更多的需求，于是遵循西方的的方法，人就越来越忙，跟着欲望跑，遵循东方的哲学方法，人就越来越闲，最终达到静止不动。

 

Ｃｈａｄ　说西方人也不都跟随西方的哲学方法，正因为此，他们才喜欢和东方认作朋友。又是一个Ｉｒｏｎｉｃ．　

 

“Ｃｈａｄ，　你在微软那末久了，也该换换工作了。　　还有我们得换个好学区的房子，Ａｌｅｘ　还有三年就上学了。。。。　换了工作多涨些钱，好买大房子。。。。。。“　 

上帝保佑我，得到这个：“Dream House to Be ”

 

寻找好学区的房子一波三折。 原来已把现在的房子的加建设计好了， 作了无数方案，终于和志德有了一些共识。 可去市政府开会时，假公济私了一把顺便把房子的平面带去询问了一下，谁知竟然说我们是转角地，相当于有两个前院，后退要都有20尺！这样基本加不了老多少了。尽管周围的房子大部分都不合规定，他们也不管。 十分气愤地将方案扔掉，只好另作打算。 于是我们的周末和平日的晚上，又加入了看房的队伍。

 

没想到竟然这个周末就看到了一个非常理想的候选房，一万多的地，非常的平，而且是纵深的，所以后院显得很大，加上摆的几个长凳，象在公园里。 房子本身很旧，五几年的吧，还是单层玻璃，都得换。 一直只有一家主人，在这养大了三个儿子，现在年龄大了，准备搬到老年公寓。至几样都异常理想。 相貌平平的房子，却让我看到了无限的潜能。 头脑里已开始盘算怎麽加建， 以至在周六的微软的野餐都没什麽心思，只想赶紧回 家搞设计。 周日又赶去还带了尺子，声势大概有点吓人。 以至其它你个看房的，都用异样的眼光看着我们。 这些人在我眼中也成了我们潜在的竞争者，看着这麽多人来看，我都有点心焦。 上帝保佑我得到这个房子吧，因为只有我才真正了解他的潜质，并帮它真正实现他的自我价值!  要到周三才知结果，工作不忙，我又开始设计。 越设计越觉得可以把它变成梦想的住宅。 设计真让人上瘾，甚至可以不吃不喝做到深更半夜。 志德说设计有点像作白日梦，我才顿悟为什麽我会这麽着迷。 屋子懒得首饰，饭也懒得吃，只想设计，设计，设计。。。。 我想我算幸运能够每天作白日梦，还能以此挣钱。  大概是帮别人做，使他们做得更好吧。